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  • Writer's pictureDezerrae Sanchez

I'm fine.

I hope this week has been off to a great start. I wanted to touch on the topic of relationships and a key component to them; vulnerability.

Relationships are an integral part of the human experience. Whether it's a romantic partnership, a familial bond, a friendship, or a professional relationship, connecting with others on a deep and meaningful level is a fundamental aspect of being human. At the heart of these connections lies vulnerability - the willingness to open ourselves up and reveal our authentic selves to others. Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness in society, but it is an essential aspect of healthy relationships. Being vulnerable means opening yourself up to the possibility of being hurt or rejected, and it requires a great deal of trust and courage. In a relationship, vulnerability can help create intimacy, build trust, and foster a deeper connection between two people.

When we think of vulnerability, we often think of sharing our deepest fears and insecurities with someone else. While this is certainly a form of vulnerability, it's important to note that vulnerability can take many forms. It can be as simple as admitting when we're wrong or asking for help when we need it. It can also involve expressing our emotions and feelings openly, even if they're difficult to articulate or uncomfortable to share.

One of the benefits of vulnerability in relationships is that it helps create intimacy. When we share our vulnerabilities with someone else, we're letting them see a side of ourselves that we might not show to the rest of the world. This level of openness and honesty can help build trust and make us feel closer to the other person. When we feel comfortable being vulnerable with someone, it can create a sense of safety and security in the relationship.

On the other hand, when we refuse to be vulnerable in a relationship, it can create distance and mistrust. If we're constantly hiding our true selves or putting up walls to protect ourselves, the other person may feel like they can't really know us or trust us. This can lead to feelings of isolation and disconnection, even if we're physically together.

Another benefit of vulnerability in relationships is that it can help us learn more about ourselves. When we're willing to be vulnerable with another person, we're forced to confront our own fears and insecurities. This can be uncomfortable, but it can also be incredibly empowering. By acknowledging our vulnerabilities and sharing them with someone else, we're taking ownership of our feelings and experiences. This can help us develop a deeper understanding of ourselves and our needs, which can ultimately lead to a more fulfilling and satisfying relationship.

Of course, vulnerability is not always easy. It requires a great deal of trust and courage to open up to someone else, especially if we've been hurt or rejected in the past. It can be scary to let someone see the parts of ourselves that we're ashamed of or afraid to confront. But it's important to remember that vulnerability is a two-way street. If we want someone else to be vulnerable with us, we need to be willing to reciprocate


It's also important to recognize that vulnerability doesn't always lead to a positive outcome. Sometimes, despite our best efforts, we'll be hurt or rejected by someone we've been vulnerable with. This can be incredibly painful, but it's important to remember that vulnerability is not a guarantee of a certain outcome. We can't control how someone else will react to our vulnerability, but we can control how we respond to it. If we're met with rejection or hurt, we can choose to use that experience as an opportunity for growth and self-reflection.

In order to cultivate vulnerability in a relationship, it's important to create a safe and supportive environment. This means being willing to listen without judgment, offering reassurance and validation, and being patient and understanding. It also means being willing to share our own vulnerabilities and emotions openly and honestly. When both people in a relationship are willing to be vulnerable with each other, it can create a powerful bond of trust and intimacy.

Vulnerability is not something that can be forced or demanded in a relationship. It's important to respect other's boundaries and allow vulnerability to develop naturally over time. It's also important to recognize that vulnerability is not the only ingredient for a healthy relationship. Communication, respect, and shared values are also essential. By understanding our own feelings and motivations, we can communicate more effectively with others and identify areas where we may be vulnerable. This, in turn, can help us set appropriate boundaries and communicate our needs and desires in a healthy and productive way.

Brené Brown does an amazing job at exploring the idea and power of vulnerability.

What is an area in life you find it difficult to allow your self to be vulnerable? How would you like that to change in your future?

1 Comment

Amy Diaz
Amy Diaz
Apr 19, 2023

It is funny - I am actually listening to the Brene Brown book on vulnerability. When I saw your blog I was like..what a coincidence!! I really must pay attention! Well said and thank you.

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